The place of LOVE.
This month, November 2023, I married my darling partner Ingo in a simple ceremony in Copenhagen. For two people who were not so fussed on the concept of marriage, it has been a truly glorious moment in our lives, and our relationship. We are deeply proud of ourselves.
And thanks to the wedding, it’s been a time of basking in the power of LOVE. And I wanted to share some of that with you!
Because it took me a long time to learn how to accept, receive and allow love into my life.
While I am well-loved and I have loved-well throughout my life, surrendering to true love within myself, and then with another, has been one of the great journeys of my life. You can read many of the other blog posts that talk about this if it interests you.
But what I know now, that love is a place.
And, it’s my favourite place.
A little back story.
When I was 24 I was told “you’re afraid of love aren’t you” and it was such a strong statement for a highly anxious young woman, that I shut that door to the brittle truth of it pretty hard. And, I proceeded through my twenties and early thirties thinking more about ‘attaining a relationship’ than ‘allowing love’ - two completely different things.
Even when I created The Continuum Process at 28, along with the health goals, salary and title ambitions and travel dreams that I was reaching, ‘attaining’ a loving relationship remained an unfulfilled desire. I did have relationships, definitely, and I never consider them failures, they mirrored what I was able to give and receive (not much) at the time, but they weren’t loving and they weren’t lasting, and that’s ok. Seasons and reasons.
That Camino, right?
Everything changed in September 2018, during my first Camino de Santiago. While walking, a gate opened and the love I had for myself, flooded me. It was unlike any love I had ever known, and it set me free. Everything changed between the 10th and 15th September 2018 within me. I wrote about it while walking & I’m so glad I did! A reminder to always write your thoughts down!
What was interesting, is I could feel another love, just as profound as the love I was freshly experiencing for myself, all around me.
I channeled this poem (pictured) on the 11th September 2018, emptied it from my heart and got on with loving life on the Camino.
Little did I know that 9 days later, I would cross-paths with Ingo. Within 5 days walking together, sharing daily moments, we were in love.
When I read this today, it just FEELS like Ingo, and the impact he has on me. I can see why, despite the barriers we faced living in different countries, my heart could “see” him right from the outset. It was open and waiting for him :)
The rest is history. And while it has not been smooth-sailing, we continue to surrender to our love. Meeting each other in that place, and moving from there together.
The impact.
Allowing such powerful love into my life has changed everything. And I thank Ingo for that. It was a love I am very deserving of. He is more than I could ever have asked for in a loving partner; kind, generous, strong and is happiest when he is making me happy.
Receiving his love, returning it, and nurturing my own love, is the truest resting place for my heart and soul and forms the foundation for all I want to create in our life.
Good things can come from this place, I’m sure you know that too :)
What the world needs now…
The practice of cultivating love is needed now more than ever.
It is THE highest vibration. It is always available to us. No one will ever take it from us.
And not just romantic love. Love for self, children, parents, relatives, friends, neighbours and colleagues. Even strangers. The more love you give, the more love you get. This is undisputed. And if you find yourself in a chapter of receiving hostility, attitude or bad behaviour (obviously not abusive or illegal situations), challenge yourself to stay in a loving place, and move from there.
This is NOT easy. But give being THAT person a go.
Love is a place we can go within and remember who we are.
It is where we find compassion, where we can forgive, find peace and connection to ourselves and others.
To remember this place, I have 3 suggestions for you:
Attend a Yin Yoga class. It teaches the art of surrender, an essential ingredient in cultivating loving feelings. I share this article all the time, please read it here.
Observe your thoughts for a few days. Are they kind thoughts? Or are they judgemental and negative thoughts? About yourself and/or others? If they are harsh, just acknowledge with compassion that they are there. That’s it. As and when you’re ready, you can explore further to see what the drivers might be. There is great power in admitting to yourself that “I’m in a stage of great <frustration and pain>”. This is part of the practice of mindfulness; here is a link to Insight Timer that can help.
Write a short letter or text to someone you love, care for or appreciate. You don’t need to send it, but doing so would be a very loving gesture - especially with Christmas coming up. But the art of expressing what you love about them, even to yourself, will fill your whole being with a sense of remembrance, gratitude and love. I promise you, you will move through your day in a more loving way by doing this.
All my love,
Alice x
